Here's a random George Dubya Bush quote generator in PHP.
<?
mt_srand(time());
print("<p><em>\"");
$choice = mt_rand(0,24);
switch ($choice)
{
case 0 :
print("If we don't succeed, we run the risk of failure");
break;
case 1 :
print("Republicans understand the importance of bondage between a mother and child");
break;
case 2 :
print("Welcome to Mrs. Bush, and my fellow astronauts");
break;
case 3 :
print("The Holocaust was an obscene period in our nation's history. I mean in this century's history. But we all lived in this century. I didn't live in this century");
break;
case 4 :
print("I believe we are on an irreversible trend toward more freedom and democracy - but that could change");
break;
case 5 :
print("One word sums up probably the responsibility of any Governor, and that one word is 'to be prepared'");
break;
case 6 :
print("Verbosity leads to unclear, inarticulate things");
break;
case 7 :
print("I have made good judgments in the past. I have made good judgments in the future");
break;
case 8 :
print("The future will be better tomorrow");
break;
case 9 :
print("We're going to have the best educated American people in the world");
break;
case 10 :
print("People that are really very weird can get into sensitive positions and have a tremendous impact on history");
break;
case 11 :
print("I stand by all the misstatements that I've made");
break;
case 12 :
print("We have a firm commitment to NATO, we are a part of NATO. We have a firm commitment to Europe. We are a part of Europe");
break;
case 13 :
print("Public speaking is very easy");
break;
case 14 :
print("I am not part of the problem. I am a Republican");
break;
case 15 :
print("A low voter turnout is an indication of fewer people going to the polls");
break;
case 16 :
print("When I have been asked who caused the riots and the killing in LA, my answer has been direct & simple: Who is to blame for the riots? The rioters are to blame. Who is to blame for the killings? The killers are to blame");
break;
case 17 :
print("Illegitimacy is something we should talk about in terms of not having it");
break;
case 18 :
print("We are ready for any unforeseen event that may or may not occur");
break;
case 19 :
print("For NASA, space is still a high priority");
break;
case 20 :
print("Quite frankly, teachers are the only profession that teach our children");
break;
case 21 :
print("We're all capable of mistakes, but I do not care to enlighten you on the mistakes we may or may not have made");
break;
case 22 :
print("It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's the impurities in our air and water that are doing it");
break;
case 23 :
print("[It's] time for the human race to enter the solar system");
break;
case 24 :
print("Mars is essentially in the same orbit...Mars is somewhat the same distance from the Sun, which is very important. We have seen pictures where there are canals, we believe, and water. If there is water, that means there is oxygen. If oxygen, that means we can breathe");
break;
}
print("\"</em></p>");
?>